i know :: one thing :: that I love you
Happy Anniversary, Babe from Kate Swoboda on Vimeo.
So, WOW. Five years. Five years? FIVE YEARS.
Which isn’t a lot in the great grand scheme of relationships, but it sure does mean something to me.
It has been the longest relationship I’ve ever had.
The most challenging and difficult relationship I’ve ever had.
The most nurturing and loving relationship I’ve ever had.
I remember this one point, maybe right around the two year mark, where we were fighting with far more regularity and it was dawning on me like a white-hot lightning bolt of DUH that relationships were not like the movies. It is exceedingly unlikely that you will ever have just ONE argument about the way certain people angle the shower spigot and then water gets on the bathroom floor and no, it’s not a big deal in the great grand scheme of life, especially when you aren’t the one who always seems to step in said water puddles and have to clean them up, and sure, maybe the person who minds that there is water on the floor has some control issues, but must we deflect to that in this moment? Couldn’t we focus on this whole water on the floor issue without making it about my–er–someone’s control issues?
(This is a hypothetical argument, of course.)
Nope, it’s possible that you might have that SAME argument, you know, maybe ten or twelve times. Across a span of several years. In several different houses. With several different shower spigots.
Also, in another “not like the movies” twist–these arguments do not usually end with a naughty romp. There’s something about arguing about shower spigots that can really kill the mood. (Or so I hear, since, of course, as I said, this is all hypothetical).
But here’s the thing–in the midst of the assorted challenges we’ve faced, what has always shown me that this man was truly an amazing, wonderful, stand-up guy is that in between the challenges, we are hands-down the most PDA couple around, the most affectionate. We are the only couple we know under 40 who is perfectly happy to pack a bag with some drawing supplies and books, head out on the highway, stop in a town and peruse antique stores, then plop on a sofa in a coffee shop and sketch or read in silence.
Also, he pets my head when I can’t sleep and sometimes I tweak my neck in the middle of the night and wake up with horrible headaches so he fetches me Aleve. I am regularly surprised by flowers. I think he is the most talented and funny person ever. He is Numero Uno, absolutely positively first in line to support me in anything that I want to do. I can run anything by him and ask for his advice without worrying that he’s worrying about what is in it for him.
And finally, he’s Italian. I mean, all of the other loveliness and then on top of that, he’s Italian? Does anyone reading this really need any more evidence that manifesting works? (Speaking of which, I did do a series of different manifesting exercises in the weeks leading up to meeting him. Coincidence? Who knows? I ain’t complainin’).
The video above was made in 2006. It was one of those weird, happenstance things where he made some weird noise and I jokingly hit his chest and then we were laughing hysterically and then I begged to get in on video. Further proof that we are “just the right kind” of weird for one another.
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My love, I adore you, respect you, and totally and completely honor who you BE. Thank you so much for the most powerful five years of my life! Happy anniversary!
~ Kate
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