show them your cracks

“There is a crack, a crack in everything / That’s how the light gets in.” –Leonard Cohen I routinely show people my cracks. This is courage, in action, especially because it is frequently my experience that others receive these cracks as unnerving. Sometimes the response is advice-giving (“She’s got a crack! Let’s fix it!”). Sometimes […]


Want peace? Take radical responsibility.

I did business with someone to the tune of many, many thousands of dollars. Long story short? They didn’t deliver on what they sold me on, and after I spoke up about that, they took to social media to be passive-aggressive about it. I was hurt. I was pissed. Months later, I noticed that whenever […]


how to make peace with the past

When people start getting into self-help, inevitably they examine their family of origin. Where did I learn these patterns? Who taught me to be afraid? Why do I keep doing this thing, over and over, even when I try to stop? “My mother always told me to be realistic, so that’s why I have so […]