why am I unhappy

“Why am I so unhappy?” you ask yourself.

Well, let me share a few possibilities.

First, you’re not just discontented and unhappy because of life circumstances, because of how your parents raised you, because of how much money you have, or (solely) because of your biochemistry.

Those are factors, but they are not the entire story.

Here’s my theory, in all its frank glory: You’re discontented because you’re actually really great, but you’re terrified of your greatness. In response to that greatness, all that crazy-amazing potential, you get afraid, and when you get afraid? You shut down.

In short? You’re not choosing your greatness. You’re not acknowledging it. You’re not cultivating more of it.

What’s more? You know you’re doing this, to yourself, and knowing this feels terrible.

I think that this is a big reason why people feel so wretched, and why they numb out, and why they beat themselves up, and why they do the crazy nonsense that they do–start drama, or let their health go, or numb out, or…

If you try this on a possibility, an explanation for why you’re so unhappy, the next question is: What to do about it?

Well, consider this possibility: you already know what to do about it. Search yourself for a second, for the truth–for you. “Why am I unhappy? What do I need to do, to stop being so unhappy?”

Listen to the answers that arise when you ask yourself “Why am I unhappy?”

Perhaps even try it on as a meditation:
Breathe. Listen.
Why am I unhappy?
Breathe. Listen.
Why am I unhappy?
Breathe. Listen.
Why am I unhappy?

For some people, the answer that arises will be something like, “I need to get my ass to yoga class, already.”

For others, it’s “time to quit procrastinating on changing jobs.”

For others, it’s “I feel really powerless, watching the world’s problems yet not doing anything pro-active to change the system.”

For others it’s going to show up as “That book I always wanted to write? I’m logging off of the computer right now, and starting, and I don’t give a shit how terrible it is. I’m writing.”

For others, it’s going to be: “Let me lay down on the bed and breathe, and quit doing-doing-doing all of the time.”

I think that you already know your truth, with this. There are a gazillion different personal growth products and people and offerings out there that can certainly help you, but I suggest: start by trusting your own True North.

Filter out all the noise. Just bring it down to this simple question: Why am I unhappy? Listen. Cry, if you need to. And then, trust what you hear when you listen deeply. Prepare to amaze yourself.